Special from the Adams Rescue Mission

By Lex McMillan

“For by grace you have been saved through faith; and this is not of yourselves, it is the gift of God” (Ephesians 2:8).

If anyone has good reason to be angry and bitter, she would seem to be a perfect candidate.  Now 60 years old, a mother and grandmother, she did not realize until she was in her 30s that before she was five years old, she had been physically and emotionally abused by her mother’s boyfriends and later by foster parents.  Only through effective counseling after a nervous breakdown, was she able to recover those painful, suppressed memories.

Her parents divorced when she was an infant.  Her father took custody of her older sister, and her mother kept her for a time along with an older half-brother.  A series of boyfriends were physically abusive. Later, she says simply, her mother gave her away to a religious couple who imposed a regimen of discipline that included corporal punishment, withholding food, and making her sleep outside underneath their mobile home.

Despite the abusive treatment, she accepted their religious instruction and prayed for Jesus to save her.  The foster parents wanted to adopt her, but her father refused and when she was five agreed to take her to live with him in Pennsylvania.  She and her mother hitchhiked from Florida to Pennsylvania. She recalls not having any shoes as they made the long journey.

Her father had a succession of girlfriends and wives, so she says she never knew what it was like to have a real mother.  Through it all, however, she never gave up on God.  Although her faith has grown deeper and stronger through her trials, she treasures the childlike faith that sustained her through so much pain.

At 18 she married her high school sweetheart immediately after their graduation.  They had two daughters together, but she learned that he was unfaithful to her.  They divorced when she was only 24, a single mother earning $6.50 an hour as a bookkeeper for a local municipality.  She proudly says that despite the struggle, she never took state aid.

Her first nervous breakdown occurred shortly after her divorce.  She was hospitalized for two days. Her church family saved her, she says. To her surprise, when she was 27, she was married again to a man she met at her church.  She says he told her it was “love at first sight.”  They have been married for 33 years.

Shortly after her second marriage, she had another breakdown that required hospitalization.  She said it felt like a light shock to her head and she simply shut down.  A third breakdown resulted in a month-long hospital stay when she thought she was going crazy; she felt fear, anxiety, and a sense of abandonment.  She thought she was dying and wondered where God was in all this.  She was “in darkness” for two years and went through multiple counselors before finding one who helped her recover the suppressed memory of the abuse she had experienced as a little girl.

She emerged from this ordeal with a stronger faith in God.  Through fervent prayers, she began to feel that the little hurt girl inside her was healing.  She came to realize God’s power and grace as she reflected on the verse that describes Him as “overseer of your souls” (1 Peter 2:25).

Despite the painful childhood, she does not harbor resentment.  God has given her the grace to forgive those who have hurt her and simply be grateful for the many blessings she treasures: her strong faith, a loving husband, two beautiful daughters, four grandchildren, and meaningful work.

In 2020 she was working as a financial assistant for a nearby municipality when Bruce Dietrick, former executive director of the Adams Rescue Mission, called.  In his characteristic fashion, he said that if she didn’t have a job, he had one for her and that even if she did, he had a better one.  Not unhappy in her good job, she had been praying for something more meaningful.  She took a cut in pay and benefits to come work for ARM and has been a treasured member of the team ever since. From her ready smile and consistent cheerful manner, one would never guess her painful journey.

To support the Mission: http://www.adamsrescuemission.org/donate-now.